Donna Kroocmo
On March 8, we celebrate International Women’s Day with countries throughout the world, and have done so since 1909.
It is an official holiday in China, Armenia, Russia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Bulgaria, Kazakhstan, Kyrgystan, Macedonia, Moldova, Mongolia, Tajikistan, Ukraine, Uzbekistan, and Vietnam.
In some countries, this day sees men honouring their wives, mothers, girlfriends, colleagues, etc. with flowers or small gifts.
In others, International Women’s Day has the equivalent status of Mother’s Day.
While the women’s movement has made great strides in the past few decades, with more women in boardrooms, working as astronauts and even prime ministers, and enjoying more educational opportunities and choices, we cannot become complacent.
We will use the day to celebrate our achievements, and resolve ourselves to continue moving in a positive direction, which is no easy task—even with the assistance and dedication of respected and powerful advocates such as the United Nations.
On the front lines of this battle, patriarchy continues to rule and we witness daily the horrific wounds of gender inequality.
A woman loses her job due to her ex coming into her place of employment and harassing her. Her employer, also a male, decides he doesn’t need the “hassle” and fires her.
With no means of supporting herself and her children, she returns to her abusive partner.
Another woman, childless, loves her dog but courageously refuses to allow her partner to continue to berate her. She leaves, but he carries out his threat to kill the dog she had to leave behind.
No charges were ever laid.
Another woman is held in contempt of court for not allowing her ex-partner access to their child. No consideration appears to be given to her difficult circumstances.
She is threatened with jail time, but at least she still has her child.
Another woman fled her abuser with her children, and without the assistance of a women’s shelter. Her lawyer wrote her new address on court documents.
When her ex was served, he appeared on the doorstep of where she was hiding. He muscled his way past her and took their son.
No custody order had been issued. No one would assist her in locating her son.
She never saw him again for more than a year.
Simple tasks, such as making choices, are foreign to most of the women we see. We have worked with women suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, broken ribs, broken legs, concussions, stab wounds, and broken spirits.
We see women paralyzed by fear who have asked for permission to do mundane things such as boiling water and going to the washroom.
It is difficult for those of us on the front-line of this battle to be celebratory. It is difficult, but not impossible.
We also have witnessed the bravery of women refusing to accept a violent lifestyle knowing that their children, if left in these situations, will repeat the damaging pattern of abuse, either as abusers themselves or as the victims of abuse, since this behaviour will be normalized for them, and will feel most comfortable to them as they become adults.
These women end the cycle of abuse. For them, and because of them, we can celebrate today.
The United Nations says it best: “No enduring solution to society’s most threatening social, economic, and political problems can be found without the full participation, and the full empowerment, of the world’s women.”
Today, we ask you to celebrate all of the women in your life—and ensure they are truly full participants and are fully empowered in all of your interactions with them.
Editor’s note: Donna Kroocmo is executive director of the Rainy River District Women’s Shelter of Hope (formerly the Atikokan Crisis Centre).
