On Sunday, the Allen family gathered for a barbecue at Pither’s Point Park here to celebrate the life of their brother, Duane, and to remember his illness that’s made their family ties stronger over the years.
They wanted him to know that life wouldn’t have been the same without him.
“Our brother is very special to us, and we felt that we should rejoice as a family on this special day because at one time it was a scary day for our family,” said his brother, Gary Allen.
It was 20 years to the day that Duane Allen received a kidney from his older brother, Gary.
“It really changed my outlook on things,” said Gary. “Afterwards, I found myself caring about things I didn’t think were important before the surgery.
“Now that Duane has his health, we have been able to really focus on our family, and we don’t take things for granted as much as we may have before,” he added.
When Duane first became ill at age 18, the family of 12 immediately volunteered to be tested for possible donors.
Of the 12 possible candidates, two of Duane’s brothers were found to be 100 percent compatible while four other siblings were 50 percent compatible.
But it was Gary, 22 at the time, who felt he was the man meant for the job. From the moment his younger brother was diagnosed, Gary said something inside him was telling him that Duane would be okay because it was meant to be.
“I knew in my mind right from the start that it was going to be me and I wouldn’t let anyone else take the opportunity,” he stressed.
Although, overall, Duane and Gary are healthy and active individuals, the surgery left both with some physical limitations that didn’t affect them beforehand.
“We can’t lift as much as we used to be able to and we shouldn’t be out in the sun very long,” noted Gary. “I also had to give up hockey because of the physical contact.
“But I wasn’t very good at it so I’m sure they aren’t missing me,” he laughed.
With each passing year, the effects of the illness become less and less prominent in the two men’s minds—but the fear of it returning always lingers.
“I don’t really worry about becoming sick anymore because I have so much other things on my plate now, but there is always a bit of a fear,” admitted Duane.
It’s been an experience for the brothers that has brought them to share a deeper bond than ever before.
“He was always my brother, but now I feel connected to him,” said Duane. “I guess I do have a piece of him in me and I will be forever grateful for his generosity.”
Today, both Duane and Gary work for Nicickousemenecaning First Nation in social roles, where they encourage children to become educated and get involved in their communities.
“We are trying to get the kids and their families more involved with family activities because you choose how you look at things, and it’s very important that with encourage positive family involvement,” Duane stressed.
It seems the Allen family gained a family focus from the experience—and a realization that a person’s health shouldn’t be taken for granted.
“Your health is a delicate. Without it, you can’t enjoy life and that’s a shame because we are given a lot of things to enjoy,” said Duane.
Fort Frances Times
Local News from Across the Rainy River District
