What’s in a car?

I don’t think I have ever had a ride in a convertible.
Don’t worry, it’s not on my list of regrets nor is it on my bucket list.
Technically, I sat on the back of the backseat of a convertible at the Emo Fair when I was 14. I somehow don’t think that counts.
I was Miss Devlin-Crozier Calf Club, a candidate for Queen of the Fair, which is almost laughable on so many levels, aside of being one of the only girls in the club.
First of all, I couldn’t be counted on to even comb my hair on a regular basis and somehow that seems like very un-queenly behavior.
Secondly, winning was determined by who sold the most tickets.
The winner, The Queen, a Jodoin girl from Pinewood if memory serves, sold more than a hundred “books” of tickets, whereas I may have been lucky if I sold 15 individual tickets.
Plus her hair was combed, so she already had the edge.
We had to wear dresses for our convertible ride past the grandstands so I slipped into the stall with my 4-H calf and pulled a dress on over my jeans.
My mother thought I was a lost cause. She may have been right.
I was so far in last place I should have ridden by the grandstands in a wheelbarrow.
In my defense, selling things has never been on my resume. An aunt of mine told me I would struggle to sell an umbrella to a penguin.
I didn’t understand that criticism then nor do I now. I have never seen a penguin with an umbrella so I’m guessing it’s a tough sell.
With the beautiful Fall weather we’ve been having here I have seen an abundance of convertibles on the road.
And I find myself wondering about those individuals behind the wheel, wondering who buys convertibles and why.
Of course, there are the obvious reasons.
Blind spots are eliminated.
A convertible has unlimited headroom, which has never been a concern of mine, but I suppose for those who aren’t vertically challenged that would be a consideration.
A big reason for me would be you can’t lock your keys inside the car.
I did that once with my babies inside and I can tell you I nearly lost my mind. I would think riding in a convertible would have a similar feeling as galloping on a horse and I don’t need to tell you which option comes out on top for me.
I read that those who buy convertibles are older and more educated.
Forbes says convertible owners have “more bucks and brains” and I wondered at first if that was a typo and it should have read “more bucks than brains,” but who’s to know.
Consumer reports also state that more than fifty percent of convertible owners are childless or empty-nesters, which makes sense as you wouldn’t want to have to floss bugs out of your children’s teeth upon arriving at school.
The Telegraph reported that personality traits can be determined by the car you drive.
Volvo owners are paranoid. The longer the hood on the vehicle, the greater the arrogance, which must mean Volkswagen van owners are the least arrogant on the planet.
Finally, the Telegraph reports that convertible owners tend to be exhibitionists and they aren’t as interested in their car being admired as much as they want to be admired.
Of course, these are all generalities but it did get me giggling when I read that 4×4 owners want to drive over you rather than around.
I’m more of a function over form kind of person, which may indicate I’m completely missing the glitz gene.
Such is life.
wendistewart@live.ca