Set your own pace

I was in line at a small grocery store the other day and the woman in front of me was struggling to retrieve money from her purse.
Her fingers weren’t co-operating and she appeared to be rushing, which intensified her struggle.
The two check-out teenagers looked at me apologetically and rolled their eyes as she dug into her purse appearing pained and rattled.
In that moment I saw an error in how society handles itself.
I reached up and put my hand on the woman’s arm and told her not to rush.
“I’m in no hurry,” I said, but that was hardly the point.
This situation wasn’t about me being delayed but rather about this woman feeling she could move at a pace that she was able to, regardless of whether that pace was approved by anyone else. It was her turn at the check-out and why is it that we feel the need to rush and step aside for those behind, putting our own needs at the bottom of the pile.
I’ve seen this time and time again, and I feel it inside myself. I am a hurrier and as a hurrier, I get flustered and discombobulated when I feel someone behind me in any lineup. I cram change and receipts into my purse and step aside quickly to ensure I am not inconveniencing anyone. I feel harried and anxious.
I’m going to try to stop doing that.
It is no different when we are driving, and come upon someone learning to drive or someone requiring more time and a slower pace to move safely in traffic. We quickly become agitated. We huff and puff, we tailgate, we honk.
We have come to the self-absorbed perspective that we should be able to move down the path of life unencumbered by those who move more slowly than we do for whatever reason.
I think the lesson here is learning to live in the moment. We can move at a pace that is respectful to others by being prepared and moving through a line efficiently, but we should adjust our pace that suits our abilities.
I don’t expect my toddler grandchildren to do their impression of Usain Bolt while they are walking with me to the park.
While they are learning to use their legs, I can step out of the way of others when required, but I also can allow my wee ones to have their turn.
Those of us who “get to” age will find all too soon that we are the ones fumbling with fingers that don’t always co-operate, with vision that requires we drive a bit slower, and I think we sometimes forget that we have the right to do so with grace.
I am going to adjust my need to hurry when it affects others. We’re all heading in the same direction–we just arrive at different times.
wendistewart@live.ca