It was an absolute cacophony of sound when I walked up to the Debating Table at the Bakery in Rainy River the other morning. All ten voices were going at once, talking…no… shouting over each other.
Envelopes were being waved and fists pounded on the table. Cups were sloshing and rattling. Peanut butter and jam were being spattered. Silverware was hitting the floor.
I stood back and tried to take it in. What was this madness?
“I tell you it goes back over two years and maybe ahead another two,” roared Petr Pychuk, his newly trimmed beard and hair trembling with indignant rage.
“No! No! It covers only the past year!” insisted Pickle as he knocked over his coffee.
“What about my ¾ ton? Do I get a rebate on it?” snorted Heavy Hauler still incensed at the latest cost of a tank of fuel for and the surtax on the purchase price of his heavy hog.
“No! I’m telling you our trucks equipped with plows should get a double rebate in consideration of all the work we’ve done this winter keeping the roads open so no one starved to death,” forcefully insisted Spiker.
The decibel level kept going up, cups were slammed, and chairs rotated positions as elbows bumped, tempers frayed, and the threat of violence reared its ugly head.
I was aghast at the complete loss of decorum.
When Cookie came wheeling out of the kitchen with three trays of donuts balanced on her arms near disaster was narrowly averted when Rick our ‘Mountie-wanna-be’ on his way to making the rounds with the coffee pot stumbled into her path and almost upscuttled the whole shebang.
A roar from Cookie immediately brought sanity and order to the proceedings. Time to put in my two cents.
I explained patiently as a hush had fallen over the din, “Look, Mr Ford has an election coming up shortly and as a forward looking man, he probably thought he should get his vote purchasing underway as soon as possible. It’s only practical. The other politicians can only make you promises that we know won’t be kept if they are elected. But not good old Dougie. NO SIRREE BOB! He’s going to buy your votes right up front, right now, with good government dollars.”
Then it hit me!
Those government dollars are coming straight out of my pocket.
Scammed again.
