They were all strangers spread equally spaced around the Debating Table at the Bakery in Rainy River Monday morning. The weather had broken and they came out of hibernation in droves just as the Groundhog had predicted they would.
But who were they?
No familiar faces. Just sets of eyes hiding behind masks. Shifty eyes darted left and right.
“Only six to a table, $%#@!” snarled Cookie as she delivered the first tray of chocolate covered longjohns into the display case. I immediately started drooling, but suppressed the urge to order, remembering my elevated blood sugar. Two late comers who were considering pulling chairs up to the table already at its limit relented and slouched into chairs along the wall tables.
The Runt showed no such restraint as he ordered toast with two peanuts butters AND jam. As I waited for my own order I checked the masked figures around the table to verify identities. A braying noise came from a bearded apparition, evidenced by stray locks of whiskers wildly escaping from his mask in all directions. It had to be Ziggy. But then it said it had been ice fishing and hadn’t caught a thing. Couldn’t be Ziggy who ‘always catches his limit’. But lo and behold it was. I guess masked anonymity has shocked him into truthfulness.
The stranger to my right also explained the fishing was slow out past the gap. I thought it might be Pickle, but then he voluntarily arose and started pouring refills for everyone. Couldn’t be Pickle; he never undertakes that without numerous pointed suggestions.
There was no sight or suggestion of our Wannabee Mountie, Rick. We wondered aloud if he might have passed. Had the Hounds of the Baskervilles finally decided to satiate their hunger or was he lying in the barn with the chickens pecking at his eyeballs? Timber wolves, coyotes, bobcats other beasts have been stalking many during this bleak winter of discontent. Will things ever return to normal?
Even Leon DeLogger from Fat Frantic, a usually jovial sort, phoned with some somber thoughts.
Leon said, “Take out your tape measure, run it out to 84 inches (we’re still not metric), put your right thumb on the 84, and now put your left thumb on your current age. Not many numbers in between, is there? But that about how much you have left.”
It was a sobering thought.
Then we debated which was worse? “To run out of time before you ran out of money or run out of money before you ran out of time?”
Norm Hyatt has the best response. “Being of sound mind, I spent it!”
“Keep your mask on. The jab is coming….I hope.”
