As the song says, “Don’t be stupid . . . .”

Well, easier said than done.
Heaven knows we have a sufficiency of stupidity right here at home in Drizzle Creek District. It’s everywhere, easy to see. I find it easiest by just looking in the mirror.
After 30 years, my wife, The Pearl of the Orient, is agreeing that action on my part is appropriate.
But our own home-grown stupidity is nothing compared to what we see out in the big wide world. Just look at Kosovo. Do you see any intelligence in that whole mess?
Our neighbour to the south, Minnesota, has some classics. A governor proclaiming loudly that students on atheletic scholarships shouldn’t be required to perform academically. In fact, they shouldn’t be required to study at all.
Perhaps Jesse has taken one too many slams to the head.
How about the Department of Natural Resources and state politicians blindly holding fast to an assessment of the “healthy state” of the walleye fishery in the border waters while allowing the continuing rape of the resource.
You could walk across good ol’ Drizzle Creek by stepping from boat to boat since the ice has gone out–without out any danger of even getting damp. That is, if you didn’t slip on the egg and milt-laden spawning fish flopping in the bottom of the boat.
Stupid? Yeah, but then again, our own Ministry of Natural Resources hasn’t closed this side of the river, either.
Meanwhile, the turmoil over the closed spring bear hunt continues to provide its own level of single-digit IQ answers.
“Instead of shooting that poor injured bear in Thunder Bay, those mean ol’ policemen should have used a more humane way of euthanizing the poor animal. Why couldn’t they just have given it a needle?” opined one caller to a radio call-in show.
Perhaps the lady would volunteer to administer the injection to an injured bear.
“That cop should be charged with reckless discharge of a firearm,” flared another, commenting on the bear-directed bullet that had ripped through a neighbouring house.
Sheeeesh! Here we are always complaining the cops can’t hit the broad side of a barn and when they demonstrate they can–on an occupied house–we complain.
For my own contribution on stupidity this week, on the bear question, why not put the bear outfitters on the public payroll–it’ll save money. Here’s how.
Excess bears will be live trapped by these new public servants but instead of hauling them out to the wilds and releasing them, load ’em all up onto cattle liners and haul them down to Trawna.
Open the chute and kind of dribble them out along the Don Valley Parkway. It’s a nice wooded ravine that would give the bears shelter and a feeling of home.
These new residents would find a ready food supply–perhaps a few tender, young children but undoubtedly a large number of homeless folks, squeegee kids, and street gang members.
Think of the money we’d save:
•eliminate a few kids–education costs drop;
•eliminate a few gang members–crime drops, and we save on policing costs;
•eliminate a few homeless bodies–we save on welfare costs and all the economic effort devoted to shelters could be redirected to corporate profits.
If you see these suggestions in a political platform in the upcoming election, remember you heard it here first.

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